Disciplining children is not easy, it requires constant vigilance, consistency and effort all the time . If you find it difficult to do this, then it is possible that sometimes you get tired and frustrated in the education of your children. Lack of discipline can be a very serious problem, although it can be tempting for parents to make excuses for their child’s behavior just so they won’t face reality. It is time to realize and change this way of proceeding!
Here are the excuses most used by parents. If you make any of these excuses … Then you should think about starting to change the way you educate your children and focus on positive discipline to achieve good results.
1. He’s a little nervous
Parents sometimes feel guilty when children are nervous about difficult times at home, such as divorce, or when they suffer from a problem at school such as bullying. It is natural to feel bad. After all, who wants to see their child hurt? But it is not justifiable.
Allowing misconduct is not the solution. In fact, nervous or stressed children need more discipline than ever to help them feel safe. Show your child that you can keep him safe by setting limits.
2. I had no intention of doing that
Children shouldn’t be disciplined for accidentally spilling a glass of milk, but they can take responsibility for their actions by helping to clean it up. Allowing too much freedom because something was an "accident" prevents children from accepting full responsibility for their behavior.
If you say things like: ‘He didn’t mean to hurt her, it was unintentionally’, your child will learn that things done ‘by accident’ are accepted. But the police will not excuse you for ‘unintentionally’ driving too fast. Not even when he is at a job will a boss keep his position for him if he is always ‘unintentionally’ late.
3. Before I was too hard on him
If you have disciplined your child too harshly and now you feel guilty, that does not mean that if he misbehaves later, let him do it. It is essential to be consistent with discipline.
Inconsistency confuses children and leads to an increase in behavior problems. So even if you were a little tougher yesterday , teach your child that you will still enforce the rules today.
4. They are children’s things
There is normalized misbehavior, but it is important to distinguish between normal behavior problems from those that are not. Allowing kids to get away with misbehavior by calling it "normal kid stuff" can be detrimental if you allow your child to break too many rules. Children need to learn to make healthier choices so they can become responsible adults.
5. I don’t want him to get angry
It is better if there is a small storm and then enjoy the calm … And without storms you do not appreciate the calm of serenity and good weather. Sometimes it can be tempting to look away when your child is having a good time and if you put him in the time out he can get angry and the environment is distorted. However, teaching children to deal with negative feelings is one of the necessary skills for life.
6. I’m too tired for this now
There will be days when you just feel too drained to apply negative consequences … But it is very important that you gather the energy necessary to be able to offer consistent discipline. Spend more time and energy on behavior problems now and you will reduce the effort required in the future. Think of the energy you put in now as an investment that will pay off later.